Homecoming

Posted on Sun Dec 26th, 2010 @ 4:32pm by Lieutenant JG Hannah Andeti

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Counselor's Personal Log,

At long last I've returned home . . . to the Pandora that is. It's kind of strange that after all this time the Pandora really does seem like home to me. I haven't felt that way in a long time and I didn't expect to feel that way -- not immediately at least -- since Earlond's departure. It is . . . strange not having him here, but there have been so many changes that it also seems almost natural for him to be gone. Perhaps that part in the ship's life really is over.

Oh who am I kidding? That part of my life is really what I mean. But it's over and whether or not he returns, not most likely, I can't live waiting for him.

My time at home on Betazed was remarkably enlightening. I sometimes forget, living among so many humans, what it's like to live with my own people. Everyone knowing all of your business all of the time certainly took some getting used to. And no, the mental blocks Earlond taught me didn't last long. Not because they didn't work, but . . . well, I suppose they didn't stand up long to my mother's insistance that I was denying my heritage and being ridiculous. I wonder what she would have made of Earlond . . .

The point being, I've decided that I'm going to start exercising my powers. The empathic powers, I doubt anyone on the ship would be entirely comfortable with a full blown telepath digging into their subconsciouses. Denying the problem isn't going to make any potential problems go away and it's probably not the worst of skills for a counselor to have.

The truth is I'm doing well. Better than expected, I guess but . . . well, if I can't say it to my own damned log, who can I say it to? I still miss the Commander . . . Earlond. I guess it will be a while before that entirely wears off.

I still haven't been sure what to make of my feelings during the last mission. My father seemed fairly certain that it was simply a momentary boredem that would pass but there is one thing about telepaths . . . he couldn't hide what little concern he did have about it. It would be nice if one day I could escape her shadow.

End log.